When Homemade feta turns to Gloop – Irene Field

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I have a dream. Not in a Martin Luther King inspired way. I have a dream to be able to cook. To reach the giddying heights of a Nigella, to become a mother of the nation in an Alison way, or to have people clamoring to buy my recipe books in a Helen Jackson way. And then I wake up. The realization hits. I am much better at words and dreams, than I am at recipes.

Every now and then however, there is a magical moment. We sit down to eat a meal prepared by she who prefers reading and writing to cooking, ie myself. A forkful is placed in one’s mouth and we look at each other in a moment of awe. The other being my adoring guinea pig husband, George. The taste tester who is often too polite to say ‘what is this?’

I want to share with you  ‘Irene’s Head Lasagna’. Why head? Because it came henceforth from this head, the one sitting astutely on my shoulders.

Surprisingly I am a dab hand at cheesemaking, feta to be exact. But one batch was determined to test me.  Instead of lovely round solid blocks of feta, I had gloop. Lovely feta, but a gloop. You cannot serve ‘gloop’ to  guests.  So I pondered. What to do with my gloop, aka Feta.

That is when  ‘Head Lasagna’ was born. Take a large sized dish . Pasta sheets – I use dry because I never know when I intend to make pasta dishes, so dry it is. Heathen I confess.  Frozen spinach – a must have in any freezer. Thaw a 500g bag of spinach, squeezing out any water, and mix in your feta. If said Feta is not a creamy gloop, I would stir in sour cream until it has reached a gloop consistency. Grated pecorino or parmesan – I have a year’s supply of pecorino – another tale for another day.  The meat of choice was Pork mince.

More heathen ways to follow. Read on if you dare.  I know I should attempt making my own pasta sauce. I will go down that road one day. But until that day, I sauté a finely chopped onion and garlic, add mince, brown it. Finally add pasta sauce.

That is it. Now to assemble ‘Irene’s Head Lasagna’.  Pasta in a greased dish, meat sauce topped with a layer of creamy feta spinach, grated cheese, repeat your layers and I finish with a sheet of pasta and finally grated cheese over that.  Ah ha! I hear you say. The Pasta will be a dry upper layer. Not so. Because once the dish is ready for the oven – I pour water in until the top layer is covered.

Note to self… next time place a dish underneath to catch messy spills. I wonder if a cleaner would agree to cleaning my bottom. The bottom of my oven thank you.

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7 thoughts on “When Homemade feta turns to Gloop – Irene Field

  1. It can’t be! Having had the delight of tasting your feta, i would declare that you are a master (mistress?) of fera-making but glad to hear you were able to find a use for the said gloopy feta. And the next batch was up to the usual standard? The feta-making reputation rescued?

    • My following batch was back to perfection. Just that one batch decided to head south. It tasted fine, but was just this big mass of gloop.

      So if either of you call in again, fear not. The feta, how it is supposed to be, is still there.


  2. What a shame about your cheese, the one I tasted was divine.
    The Lagana sounds really good too. Did Guin…oops I mean George like it?

    • George loved the lasagne. It was absolutely divine – and I am not a spinach lover by any means. Just a nice take on it rather then your usual tomato based only ones.